There is this online group which I’m a member of. It’s all about sexuality, with open talks, pictures, sharing and even meetings.
I’m not very active there, yet definitely follow what’s happening. The guys in the group didn’t seem very interesting to me, yet there was this one guy who wasn’t very active participant, yet he seemed hot and I liked his look and vibe.
Here and there I tagged him on stuff e.g. group games which ask you to tag someone, yet he didn’t get the message and I figured out he was just not interested. Yet one time in one of those games, someone tagged both me and him, saying each of us has to take a silly picture for the group, preferably naked. I used this opportunity for heavy flirting, asking if there’re extra points for a shared pic, and then he FINALLY got the hint. on the very same night we already met for a drink at a bar close to my place, with the clear intention of getting it on. I was quite excited by getting to meet him at last..
There’s a saying: “the bigger the expectations are, the bigger the disappointment will be”. He was cute looking, yet shorter than me by at least 15 cm, which I find VERY unattractive. I decided it was rude to just say I’m not into it so I decided to stay for one drink, and we sat and talked. He was cute, nice, we shared a lot in common, but I was just not attracted to him in any way. At some point he started taking my hand and kissing me on the chick, and I felt awkward. Maybe I should have left or say something, but at some point I decided to give it a try – we were already there, and I did want to have sex that night.. Just maybe with someone hotter? On the other hand – why not take sex more lightly and just enjoy it, even if it’s not going to be super passionate?
We headed off to my place, it was a pleasant sex, nice, calm, not very wild yet ok. His dick was quite tiny, proportional to the tiny figure. It was weird being in the mood for sex but not with him, felt like a guy who just wants to fuck, no matter what… Couldn’t really enjoy it.
What I hated about this experience was that I couldn’t fake any passion towards him – not by coming, not by touching him enthusiastically, no licking or sucking.. Just didn’t feel like it and couldn’t do it.
We fell asleep afterwards and at the morning he was up for another round, which I rejected. He apologized he has to go home early and I said it was ok (and in my heart I was like YESSS GO HOMEEEE!!!)
Ever since he’s been inviting me to hang out, go traveling, have a drink.. I’ll have to just say it directly, that I’m just not into him, and that’s not easy for me to do.